Well said, much respect ✊🏻 on keeping your head about you and being a stand up man and dad. I’ve found many, if they were honest with themselves, just felt like they had to have a “relationship” to make it moral. Fortunately there are those you could say, save it, I’m good without that, we both have needs. And, not doing, or taking that as a challenge to change it. Thanks for your work.
I believe the first and harshest place for critique is the self. Self-assessment is a gift.
To put it bluntly, if I allow base desires to dictate behavior, it would reveal some pretty flawed aspects of my nature. The awareness that I could go awry is why I determined that extreme clarity & honesty was a better tact.
Knowing that about myself and trying to keep in mind that I have children... I want to conduct myself in a way I would want them to conduct themselves. I want to conduct myself in a way I would want those they choose to "connect with" to conduct themselves. As I indicated to one, sometimes poorly behaved, friend with two daughters, "If a man views and treats your daughters the way you view and treat the women you 'go out' with, don't be upset. You're setting the standard."
While my post was REALLY about the song, its lyrics, and origin story, I've received a fair amount of feedback on the concept of being honest in relationships. Hmm... perhaps it is a topic worthy of writing more about.
The notion that one should lead with one's heart is, perhaps, part and parcel of the greatest hit of disinformation spewed to and by the avatars of the sixties youth culture, many rock n roll bands and much of what people often thought of as progressive.
The mantra the youth culture and rock n roll lived by: "Do it if it feels good. Let it all hang out." I used to believe in this. In my youth, I felt obliged to press down hard on the accelerator upon hearing the mightiest and most strident chords in "Brown Sugar." This eventually became the mantra of the gay rights movement as one of the songs in the "Rocky Horror Picture Show" contained this lyric: "Don't dream it. Be it."
However, some things are best only dreamed about.
Illicit sexual contacts can have all the allure of "Cassablanca," a Great Horror film and a really hot strip tease all rolled into one, but sexual liasions can have irrevokable adverse effects:
A ) A deadly disease
B) An unwanted child
C) Severed relationship with existing parnters with whom you have children -- and the severing of the previously existent relationship may mean a child growing up without one of his parents.
I agree David... and, dang!! I love those RHPS songs.
Also, I'm a passionate and driven person. My heart plays a role - it's just not the leading role. It can give me a drive to pursue something - an ambition - but I still need to consider that pursuing that passion actually means.
Well said, much respect ✊🏻 on keeping your head about you and being a stand up man and dad. I’ve found many, if they were honest with themselves, just felt like they had to have a “relationship” to make it moral. Fortunately there are those you could say, save it, I’m good without that, we both have needs. And, not doing, or taking that as a challenge to change it. Thanks for your work.
Thanks for stopping by to comment.
I believe the first and harshest place for critique is the self. Self-assessment is a gift.
To put it bluntly, if I allow base desires to dictate behavior, it would reveal some pretty flawed aspects of my nature. The awareness that I could go awry is why I determined that extreme clarity & honesty was a better tact.
Knowing that about myself and trying to keep in mind that I have children... I want to conduct myself in a way I would want them to conduct themselves. I want to conduct myself in a way I would want those they choose to "connect with" to conduct themselves. As I indicated to one, sometimes poorly behaved, friend with two daughters, "If a man views and treats your daughters the way you view and treat the women you 'go out' with, don't be upset. You're setting the standard."
While my post was REALLY about the song, its lyrics, and origin story, I've received a fair amount of feedback on the concept of being honest in relationships. Hmm... perhaps it is a topic worthy of writing more about.
I can understand the long periods of celibacy:-) The song is 👍
J
On Leading with one's heart:
The notion that one should lead with one's heart is, perhaps, part and parcel of the greatest hit of disinformation spewed to and by the avatars of the sixties youth culture, many rock n roll bands and much of what people often thought of as progressive.
The mantra the youth culture and rock n roll lived by: "Do it if it feels good. Let it all hang out." I used to believe in this. In my youth, I felt obliged to press down hard on the accelerator upon hearing the mightiest and most strident chords in "Brown Sugar." This eventually became the mantra of the gay rights movement as one of the songs in the "Rocky Horror Picture Show" contained this lyric: "Don't dream it. Be it."
However, some things are best only dreamed about.
Illicit sexual contacts can have all the allure of "Cassablanca," a Great Horror film and a really hot strip tease all rolled into one, but sexual liasions can have irrevokable adverse effects:
A ) A deadly disease
B) An unwanted child
C) Severed relationship with existing parnters with whom you have children -- and the severing of the previously existent relationship may mean a child growing up without one of his parents.
Sometimes, it is best to keep fantasizing.
Not everything that glitters is gold.
I agree David... and, dang!! I love those RHPS songs.
Also, I'm a passionate and driven person. My heart plays a role - it's just not the leading role. It can give me a drive to pursue something - an ambition - but I still need to consider that pursuing that passion actually means.
What does RHPS mean
Rocky Horror Picture Show! :-)