Although the topic is gut wrenching, you manage to write with humor and flair. That's very impressive.
Also, you wrote of his guilt and shame, saying, "He keeps repeating, “I fucked everything up. I did this to myself."
It is essential that his shame be kept within bounds. If his shame is too intense, he might hate himself. And if he hates himself, he won't believe that he is worth saving and his addition, and ensuing problems, may get worse. He must love himself so he will endeavor to save himself. He must soberly understand and criticize himself for making dangerous decisions, but he must always realize that he is better than his mistakes.
This is the challenge. It is one of the reasons that he needs to open up about some of the emotional garbage he carries around but does not feel worthy of discussing.
Today is a big day; he leave the hospital. I'm glad for the progress and anxious about the progress.
After saying I'd give this a read on the shoutout thread I reluctantly click on it and here we are. I put my mother through about 30 years of Hell addicted to heroin. I try to avoid thinking about how it affected her, and appreciate your humour. She had it too, when scoring with and for me occasionally. She once asked the delaer in the back of her car if it was 'Good Stuff' because I'd told her the bit I'd bought that morning (that she paid for) wasn't any good. of course it was fine, I just wanted more. You always want more. Good stuff, I enjoyed it. Best of luck with the little shit. I mean that in the best possible way.
Thanks Chris. Our family used gallows humor as an effective emotional deflection device. As my mom used to say, "I'm laughing so I don't cry."
He's doing as well as we can hope - learning to code and pretty happy from what I can tell. It's time for an update on his condition and progress. I'm hoping to get some audio or video with him. Thanks again for stopping by and leaving a comment.
Likewise, my entire Substack is largely gallows humour. Get him socializing. I don't actually believe in addiction, I mean on a physical level, of course, you stop and it's going to hurt like Hell, but the actual continued using is a lack of connection. Fail to make that change and he'll end up back where he started. Best wishes.
For sure.. he is with us for the time-being. He is learning to code and has become a bit obsessive over it. His older brother is a software developer for LinkedIn. I write software for Meta (Facebook). I concur with your take on addiction.. My oldest turned me onto Johann Hari's work (Chasing the Scream and his TED Talk on addiction).
Johan is a bit too 'Addiction is a disease' for me. But it's a good message regarding having honest conversations about drug use and legality. You might get something out of Jeffrey Schaler's 'Addiction is a Choice', which certainly kept me sane during my twenty-odd rehabs. I befriended him in the end, quite the character. Ended up on methadone for back problems, and tapered himself off; so no more people screaming 'But you don't know what it's like!' in his face.
Although the topic is gut wrenching, you manage to write with humor and flair. That's very impressive.
Also, you wrote of his guilt and shame, saying, "He keeps repeating, “I fucked everything up. I did this to myself."
It is essential that his shame be kept within bounds. If his shame is too intense, he might hate himself. And if he hates himself, he won't believe that he is worth saving and his addition, and ensuing problems, may get worse. He must love himself so he will endeavor to save himself. He must soberly understand and criticize himself for making dangerous decisions, but he must always realize that he is better than his mistakes.
This is the challenge. It is one of the reasons that he needs to open up about some of the emotional garbage he carries around but does not feel worthy of discussing.
Today is a big day; he leave the hospital. I'm glad for the progress and anxious about the progress.
After saying I'd give this a read on the shoutout thread I reluctantly click on it and here we are. I put my mother through about 30 years of Hell addicted to heroin. I try to avoid thinking about how it affected her, and appreciate your humour. She had it too, when scoring with and for me occasionally. She once asked the delaer in the back of her car if it was 'Good Stuff' because I'd told her the bit I'd bought that morning (that she paid for) wasn't any good. of course it was fine, I just wanted more. You always want more. Good stuff, I enjoyed it. Best of luck with the little shit. I mean that in the best possible way.
Thanks Chris. Our family used gallows humor as an effective emotional deflection device. As my mom used to say, "I'm laughing so I don't cry."
He's doing as well as we can hope - learning to code and pretty happy from what I can tell. It's time for an update on his condition and progress. I'm hoping to get some audio or video with him. Thanks again for stopping by and leaving a comment.
Likewise, my entire Substack is largely gallows humour. Get him socializing. I don't actually believe in addiction, I mean on a physical level, of course, you stop and it's going to hurt like Hell, but the actual continued using is a lack of connection. Fail to make that change and he'll end up back where he started. Best wishes.
For sure.. he is with us for the time-being. He is learning to code and has become a bit obsessive over it. His older brother is a software developer for LinkedIn. I write software for Meta (Facebook). I concur with your take on addiction.. My oldest turned me onto Johann Hari's work (Chasing the Scream and his TED Talk on addiction).
Johan is a bit too 'Addiction is a disease' for me. But it's a good message regarding having honest conversations about drug use and legality. You might get something out of Jeffrey Schaler's 'Addiction is a Choice', which certainly kept me sane during my twenty-odd rehabs. I befriended him in the end, quite the character. Ended up on methadone for back problems, and tapered himself off; so no more people screaming 'But you don't know what it's like!' in his face.
Where is he going upon leaving the hospital